Bed rest-ed for days

Yeah, my last so-called weekend wasn't the last time I had my work day-off. The next weekend (couple days ago) also a time for me to get some rest from work. Unfortunately, I didn't enjoy it, since I was bed-rested.

I got my periodical-illness, a time where my body screams for relieve from my routine. That means I got to stop smoking, stop working, and have some total rest; in terms of 12hours of sleeping, couple of hours being awake for meals, and then spent the rest of the day for some more sleep. Those were the days where I got nothing to do beside sleep and eat, and less shower.

Now I'm back, quite refreshed; but still with some sore throats and uncomfort nostrils. Euw..

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Done My Part

Sometimes, it feels suck to do everything that somebody want me to do, while I'm not putting my heart for it. It's not because I dislike the person or the task. But because of the reason that I just can't let him down. And the worse part of it, that he never realize that what he's asking for is just way too unprecise.

I never put my self in arguing position, which most people, I know, feel sorry for. Darn. Why is it keep on happening on me?

I have a list of projects that we would like to conduct. Some are software development, and the others are computer supplying. Based on my perception, doing software development is requireng less fund but indeed consume my self (as a potential resource) excessively. In the other hand, supplying computers requires a great amount of fund for a start. Of course, the revenue from supplying computers is far greater than doing some software development. But what can I say, here we are, stuck in this condition.

These days, no procurement can be processed without adequate fund. And that makes us totally immobilize. So, unless there's a computer supplier that would willingly accept an agreement of pay-later with us, there's not much we can do except waiting for a chance to shine on us.

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Getting used to it (again)

Finally, I begin to start wandering the town during midnite hours (again) :p It ain't so hard since all the friends that were here all along, still standing still on the same spot as I left them for my so-called "runaway-trip".

We're having quite long trip, tonight. Picking up Kaboy at Iskandar Muda sure is worth doing-for, since we're having the chance to browse for some "midnight ladies" along the street. Well, it was just for fun, really .. I'm just an ordinary guy which enjoys such a group-thrill, especially when my friends are around. I found it as an effective stress-relief activity. Wanna try it? I'm not suggesting anyone, but I also cannot prohibit any of you to do so, since I found a benefit from it ;)

Enough with that, let's change the subject. The TST also great, especially when an instant noodle accompanied the drinks. Well, I have to admit that I miss that "Nasi Perang", but since there was no more ingredients available for the mentioned menu, I need to decide on a substitute. Otherwise my stomachace will getting worse (I haven't got any meal since lunch time). Tonight sponsor was IndoSinergy (LOL). Thanks to Kaboy. Glad to have someone to rely starting from now on.

Talking about "reliable person", I miss the days when I once used to be one :(
I think, that thought should motivated me back then. Don't know if I still can work the effort. Sometimes it sucks to be such a layback, but working my ass to the bone for some unclear purpose also ain't sattisfying me no good.

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Return to Home-base

Finally, after 40 days of mind-relaxing runaway-trip, I set my foot back in Medan. The trip was a pleasant one, so were the people I met along. Thanks for everything, guys : D

10 days in Jakarta, and 30 days in Batam was a great relieve for me. Even though that wisemen says that "running away from a problem doesn't solve it" doesn't mean that a temporary retrieve means a flaw. In my experience, stepping out from the conflict zone and make myself ready to break the iceburg, sure is working effectively. Hahaha.. Look at me right now, laughing out loud.

Err.. I want to apologize for not be able to see you (Lin), while I was in Jakarta. Seriously, I don't have the chance. I'll make it up with you next time ;)

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It hurts like ...

Don't know how to describe my feelings right now.

Things got really mixed-up right now for me. Feelings' issue. My past relationship eventually become something that I must avoid. Every day I tried to make things got worse (I found it amusing, to turn something into it's uneasy state). Since I don't want things to got better (pretty simple reason, huh).

It sucks to know that bad things were actually happened, back then. Just when I was thinking that things were great!

That problem was the past, and since I always try to tell myself not to regret the past. I don't think that that line above is a good sentence to be written down. But since it's actually a delayed-confession, so it's actually a feeling I have in the present (which means, I am allowed to write it down .. LOL). Still, I feel like I'm the foolish one .. and I don't like being in that state because of one was doing it on purpose.

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I'm motivated

Right now, I'm just about to laugh at myself.. How ironic, that I lost my determination back then. Not for something that can be considered as an obstacle, or any of that sort-of thing. But just because one hell of "coziness", shot, how can that thing happened.


Thanks that someone waken me up, just a few days ago. I was really brought back to my senses. I can't say that I was being scolded .. no-no-no, it was more like an echo of my own deep-down-heart's voice, being spoken out-and-loud (through a telephone line) :: LOL.

I can see clearly now, the rain has gone ;)

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What a Life

I've been living as an un-employeed person for quite sometimes right now. And it sucks.

No monthly income, no salary-slip. But then again, I guess that's the only disadvantages I have. The rest is quite giving me advantages instead. Name it independent busy-ness scheduling.

What I just realize is that I have one great time-management myself. Even thou that I lack in my previous habit, and that is to wake-up early in the morning ('coz I don't have much thing to do), I love it. That means I spend more time at home instead of sitting on the same chair 10 hrs a day doing s**t.

But that situation won't last long. Since I'm going to do some serious business soon. Yeah, this one hell of act is a giant step for me. Hey, remember what they said, a one-mile journey start with one step. So, I'll just let everything flow.

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Now that I must catch-up with 'em

There were times when I thought that working in a single place for a long period-of-time might cause some brain damage. But I never thought that I was currently on that path.

More of it, it's not only lack of motivation that got into me. Now I also realize how much I've been left out from my previous campus-mates' skill progress. So much for the motto ..

"IT, keep it up-to-date"

I'm really going to have lots-and-lots of study to do. New skills to learn. New knowledges to learn. And I know it won't be easy, but hey .. I will never know whether I can do it or not if I never give it a try, right?

So the plan is to leave this place and move on with life (and of course a short-period-of-time plan). Wish me luck here eh, mate ;-)

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Solidarity

I learnt things as I enjoy my live.

As I tried to forget about what I had been waiting for for this day, the SOLIDARITAS KEBERSAMAAN (Indonesian) wrist-band which is a token for my donation. Firstly I was affraid that I'd be cheated, but then I say to myself ... "you're doing your part, and that's all".

Ha! Got them all right now!

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